The following is a true story of a family who went through the process of embryo donation and adoption.
My husband and I decided to start a family in early 2007. After about 15 months and no pregnancy, we found out that our chances of conceiving on our own was very small. I grieved for the children I’d imagined about for many years and we soon discussed our options. We could always try in vitro fertilization (IVF) but neither one of us really felt drawn to that as an option. We also considered traditional adoption – something we had both been very open to pursuing well before we knew we couldn’t have biological children.
However, there was a third option we looked at – embryo adoption. After a friend was blessed through embryo adoption, we decided pursue it as a way to build our family.
We soon applied for adoption through the National Embryo Donation Center (NEDC). Through the process, we learned that there are nearly 500,000 frozen embryos in the United States and to listen to the mainstream media, embryonic stem cell research is the only useful option for these tiny lives. However, these embryos can be thawed and transferred and given the opportunity to grow and bless countless families. The adoption process was similar to that of any traditional adoption – we went through numerous background checks, home visits, and reference checks. After getting our “all clear”, we had a medical consultation in May 2009 with Dr. Jeffrey Keenan, NEDC director, in Knoxville, TN. During that visit we received medical clearance to proceed with our embryo transfer, which would be scheduled for September 2009.
On July 31, 2009, we received 40 profiles from donor families. I had no idea we would have so many from which to choose and felt overwhelmed at the responsibility that was before us. Of the 40, there were four that were labeled “special consideration embryos”. This was due to some known medical issue with either the biological parents or siblings. We thoughtfully began our selection process picking profiles with similar physical characteristics to our own. One of the special consideration profiles had biological parents with characteristics very similar to Jeremy and me. I researched the issue listed and realized it wasn’t that big of a deal so we put them back in the stack and continued to narrow our list. The next day we had narrowed the field of 40 to eight profiles. We left for church that Saturday with the profiles laid out across our coffee table and said we needed to contemplate some more. During that service, we both felt a clear direction on the profile to choose. As walked out of service and moved across the parking lot, I looked at Jeremy and said I knew which ones we were supposed to pick. He looked at me and said “the ones with the heart.” He knew, too. See, the “special consideration” profile, which wasn’t at the top of our short list, were listed as such because of siblings born with history of Ventricle Septal Defect (VSD) otherwise known as a hole in the heart. We came home and quickly put the other seven profiles away and started staring at the sheet of paper listing only basic physical characteristics, but to us, this represented our children. Within the next few days it was confirmed that profile #1200 with 13 embryos was now ours.
Our transfer date of September 17 came very fast and we finally got to see the picture of three little embryos thawed out and plumped up, ready for a “womb for rent”. The transfer procedure was completed and we waited for eleven days to get our results.
On September 28, 2009, I received a call from the nurse in Knoxville who said the words that I will never forget – “You are very pregnant!.” My pregnancy hormone level was over three times the minimum they like to see! October 14, 2009 was another milestone day for us. That was the day we saw and heard the heartbeats of our adopted twins growing in my belly. Twins! At only six weeks pregnant, a time when many are just finding out they are expecting, these babies had strong heartbeats – evidence that these are far more than a bunch of cells.
Our precious babies, Grant Louis and Maria Isabel were born on April 17, 2010. While they were about seven weeks ahead of schedule, they were perfect.
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